Obi-Wan Kenobi

Gather around, Younglings.

A long time ago, in this galaxy, right here, people absolutely hated the Star Wars Prequels. I mean hated. If you think Star Wars fans are toxic now, it all started in the late 1990's when a Lucasfilm executive had the inspired idea to "engage fans online." It was a great idea that has in no way whatsoever lead to the decline of Western Civilization.

There was a time when anyone writing about the prequels online couldn't help but make snide comments about how terrible they were, even if they were writing about something completely uncontroversial, like their box office performance or visual effects. And these people would do it as though it were absolute fact. Prequel Derangement was like an itch. They couldn’t help themselves. This sickness drove “fans” as far as to make life miserable for prequel actors like Jake Lloyd, Ahmed Best, and Hayden Christiansen. The over-the-top backlash to the prequels was one of the contributing factors that motivated the sale of Lucasfilm to Disney.

However, by the time we got to the Disney era, attitudes had changed significantly and there grew a new appreciation for George Lucas' maligned second trilogy. Part of this was that people who were kids when the prequels released were now grown up and nostalgic for their Star Wars. Part of it was people seeing the quality that was always there alongside the flaws. And part of it was just that there was now much more Star Wars for fans to hate on so they couldn't devote all of their attention to hating on the Prequels.

It was with this new perspective that Obi-Wan Kenobi was released. It is a show that leans heavily into Prequel nostalgia in way that would have been impossible even five years earlier. It even kicks off with a pretty awesomely unapologetic prestige TV-style recap of the Prequels. I mean, Jesus, Jar-Jar is even in it (briefly.)

The show, of course, brings back Ewan MacGregor as Obi-Wan. Ewan is an actor who, like Harrison Ford and Alec Guinness before him, had mastered the near-impossible task of turning out a good performance despite working with George Lucas' writing and direction. Even people who hated the prequels praised Ewan MacGregor’s characterization, so bringing him back  was a no-brainer. More remarkable, is the return of Hayden Christiansen as Anakin/Vader, an actor who was often the target of Prequel hater's ire and who starts his continuing redemption tour with this show. 

These two actors have always had great chemistry both on and off-screen. The shared experience of making Attack of the Clones and Revenge of the Sith together seems to have bonded them like brothers. Witnessing their rekindled bromance was one of the great joys of the Obi-Wan Kenobi press junket. There is a lot of well-documented toxicity around Star Wars (and around this show specifically) but seeing Ewan and Hayden back together again was wholesome and delightful. Indeed, these two have grown into elder statesmen of Star Wars and it was quite gratifying to see Hayden get a veritable hero’s welcome from the fans attending Star Wars Celebration in Japan last year. He shows up in multiple capacities here, some wonky de-aging notwithstanding.

The show, however, is wildly uneven, poorly-paced, and full of puzzling decisions. We start as we might expect, with an Obi-Wan who is older and full of regret and trauma eking out a living on Tattooine, within a stone’s throw of young Luke Skywalker and his adopted family. Instead of this story being the predictable Tatooine-based adventure involving Ben and Luke, we turn our focus to Anakin and Padme’s other child, Leia, here a mischievous ten year-old-girl who is kidnapped from her adopted family on Alderaan as part of a plan to lure Kenobi out of hiding. 

As might be expected from a story set in this time period roughly half way between Revenge of the Sith and A New Hope, the Jedi hunting inquisitors are the main antagonists, at least in the first half of Obi-Wan Kenobi. The Imperial Inquisitorius were introduced in Star Wars Rebels and later fleshed out in other media as the squad of former Jedi that Vader and Palpatine turned to the dark side to help them hunt down the Order 66 surviving Jedi (of which there were quite a few, it turns out.)

 

The Grand Inquisitor and the Fifth Brother are both straight from Rebels but have suffered a bit in the translation from animation to live-action. The Grand Inquisitor is particularly disappointing as he is a Pau’an, a species we have already seen in Revenge of the Sith in all its Nosferatuesque glory, here rendered inexplicably egg-headed and human-looking. 

The Inquisitor who gets the most time is Reva, the Third Sister. We see her as a youngling in a flashback at the start of the series during an Order 66 flashback and later stabbed with a lightsaber by Anakin Skywalker and left for dead (more on that later.) Reva has figured out that Darth Vader is Anakin and wants to find Kenobi in order lure Vader into a position to kill him. Moses Ingram plays Reva and does an admirable job with a fairly mediocre and one-note character who is largely just written as a tropey “tough chick.” What’s worse, she goes on a genuinely dumb and unmotivated rampage at the Lars homestead, which basically ruins what would have otherwise been a tragic and meaningful character arc. What’s worse, the Jedi Fallen Order game featured another conflicted Inquisitor who was given a similar and much more nuanced characterization which makes Reva feel oddly redundant.

All of that said, none of this is on the shoulders of Moses Ingram who was hired to play a character written from an imperfect script. Of course, none of that stopped racist assholes from harassing her online. There is a certain strain of Star Wars fan who seem to get oddly triggered when seeing women and people of color headlining these projects and they seem to make it their mission to harass people online. It got so bad that Ewan McGregor had to record a damn video about it.

Again, not to say there aren’t any number of legitimate issues with this project, such as some oddly-lackluster “action” sequences such as a runaway Jedi using the force to pull down an awning which somehow stops a trio of inquisitors from pursuing him. Or in a later scene when Vader and a squad of Stormtroopers look on helplessly when Obi-Wan is pulled away to safety a mere twenty feet away with only a thin wall of fire separating them. And do not get me started on the hare-brained sequence in which Obi-Wan breaks into the Fortress Inquisitorious to rescue a kidnapped Leia (another element ripped from Jedi Fallen Order) and attempts to smuggler her out in a damn overcoat. 

So there are a lot of issues here. But a lot works as well. Not only do we get Ewan and Hayden but but also Joel Edgerton and Bonnie Pliese reprise their roles from the prequels as Owen and Beru Lars, as do Jimmy Smits as Bail Organa, Leila’s adopted father. Even Temuera Morrison gets a cameo as a down-on-his luck Clonetrooper. We also get a cameo from Ian McDiarmid as Palpatine. Maybe most impressively, Liam Neeson appears in the show's final moments, paying off a subplot from Episode III. And that's not even mentioning a new John Williams theme for the show. 

Indira Varma (who played opposite Pedro Pascal in Game of Thrones) is introduced here as an Imperial double agent who is helping feeling Jedi and Force sensitives in a kind of Underground Railroad. She is a great character who feels straight out of Andor and who ends up being influential on Leia. And of, course, there is Leia, here played by Vivian Lyra Blair who manages to capture some of the regal command of Princess Leia but also some of legendary sass and wit of Carrie Fisher herself. I would love to see her play Leia again in a future project.

The show unfortunately starts a maddening trend in Disney Star Wars of people surviving being impaled on lightsabers, the very wound on which the fate of the galaxy turned with the killing of Qui-Gon in Episode 1. There are three different instances of this in this show alone. Reva, survives this wound not once but twice. So does the Grand Inquisitor, from a wound inflicted by Reva who should have known better.

But ultimately, this was billed as the Rematch of the Century between Obi-Wan and Vader and their final duel is wildly satisfying and even helps to elevate the rest of the show. This is really a top tier Star Wars duel and very much worth the price of admission, and even contains some moments that emotionally pay off the Prequels in a way that was not possible under George Lucas’ direction. It is for a few short moments in this final duel that Hayden’s return really counts leading to a moment that is one of the most iconic in Star Wars both in terms of the story of the Skywalker Saga and also in the meta sense for us fans who always knew that these guys could act and that Star Wars can also serve up haunting and heartbreaking moments.

FAN CUTS

I think Fan Cuts are fascinating an have been a part of Star Wars since at least The Phantom Menace. I talked about a fan edit of The Book of Boba Fett which I thought was a really interesting way to watch the story. I also watched the Patterson Cut of Obi-Wan Kenobi, which for my money is a much better version of the story in only because it removes some of the things that don’t work in the show such as Reva’s survival of her clash with Vader and subsequent Tattooine rampage. It also adds some minor visual fixes such as offering improved de-aging, fixing the “40 Year-Old Padawan” effect.

Patrick Garone

The Ancient Origins of We Lowly Gods

My upcoming novel, We Lowly Gods, is set to release in June. It’s a story I’ve been living with for a long, long time. As in, since the early 1990’s. 😬

The novel is a mythic fantasy adventure set in the waning years of an Ancient Greece in which it has been decades since anyone has seen the Olympian gods. All that remains of their great pantheon are scattered communities of Chimerics—Fauns, Centaurs, Nymphs, and other wild creatures scraping by in the shadows of humanity. When a Faun is brutally murdered outside a remote village in ancient Sicily, it sets our Chimeric heroes on a quest to find out what happened to the gods and to put into place a daring plan to replace them and to keep humanity in check. Unfortunately, they are not the only ones attempting to fill the void left behind by the gods and other powerful entities plan to install their own faiths, faiths that do not include a place for misshapen Chimeric demigods. 

The earliest version of this story, a vignette featuring a young Faun looking out over the orgiastic Festival of Pan and contemplating his place in the world—was written in a high school creative writing class. Although I no longer have the MacWrite file for that piece, there is a scene in the final book that is very similar to that original piece (as far as I can recall, that is.)

As I worked on the story in the ensuing years (in a variety of archaic word processors), it became a tale about a young Faun who was tasked by his elders with escorting a powerful god-creature across a mythological landscape in order to revitalize a blighted world. From a certain point-of-view that is still a major plot of We Lowly Gods. Fun fact: after the release of The Phantom Menace, I rewrote the story to feature a young Qui-Gon Jinn who crash lands on a primitive, off-limits planet and is given a similar task. Lucasbooks, if you are reading, this is still a viable story.

The story took a backseat to other pursuits, theatrical projects, my first novel, City of the Gods (no relation), going back to school to get my Bachelors and Masters, and it faded into my subconscious the way abandoned stories sometimes do.

That is until 2019. In 2019, I was fresh out of a seven-year relationship that ended in a kind of personal disaster. I was feeling deeply isolated and depressed and barely holding it together, with only a truly excellent cat to keep me company. 

RIP, Arigato. Thank you, indeed.

As I was working my way through this dark period, I decided to complete a bucket-list trip to southern Italy which took me from Naples, to Salerno, to Palermo. I hadn’t gone on a big international trip in a decade and it was exciting to get back on the road for three weeks. And while I saw some amazing Roman ruins like Pompeii and Herculaneum I was not ready for all the stunning Greek sites that dot the region. 

The ruins at Segesta, in Sicily.

Southern Italy and Sicily it turns out were the sites of major Greek colonies which, in some cases, surpassed even eastern cities like Athens. Greek culture is a major part of the unique cultural identity of southern Italy and some of the finest examples of Classical Greek architecture are actually found in Italy. So there I was wandering around places like Paestum, Agrigento, and Segesta and I got to thinking about my old story about the Fauns and wondered “What if it took place in Italy instead of Greece?” More than anything, that change gave me an instant cultural connection to the material, after all, my family is from southern Italy, that those Greek colonists could have been my own ancestors.

The ruins at Agrigento in Sicily.

From there it was off to the (chariot) races. I wrote a short story and over the next couple of drafts expanded it into a novel, letting the characters and story beats stretch out and breathe. I worked on it during a couple of more trips both in Spain and I finally “finished” it in 2024 on another trip to Sicily, where the beginning of the book would ultimately be set. 

The ruins at Paestum, near Salerno.

I’ve followed the example of my favorite author, the late great Anne Rice, a writer of almost exclusively supernatural fiction featuring vampires, ghosts, mummies and other outlandish horror tropes but all infused with her deep humanity, with her own struggles, her own trauma, her own yearning  for meaning. Despite the fact that my lead characters are half-goat godlings, We Lowly Gods is truly the most personal thing I’ve written to date in which I deal with some of my own ancient wounds through the prism of what I hope to be a compelling and subversive fantasy adventure filled with gods and creatures.

Look for it in June.

Patrick Garone

Monster Movie of the Week: Godzilla: King of the Monsters

​A direct sequel to Gareth Edward’s Godzilla, King of the Monsters is an epic third entry to the then-new Monsterverse, bringing in a trio of classic Toho monsters to join the titular Titan which is what fans wanted instead of the rather generic MUTOs from the first movie. 

Michael Dougherty directs here and the tone is consistent with the epic and more serious vibe of the fist movie, although with more humor shoehorned in which I don’t think works that well. This is in contrast to the Monsterverse entry that preceded it, Kong Skull Island, which was a more lighthearted movie and the humor was much more organic.

On the visual side, I will say that this might be the most beautifully-shot Kaiju movie I have ever seen. There are about a half dozen or so really iconic shots in this movie and generally an approach that is almost painterly in the way shots are composed and the use of light, color, and texture. This is gorgeous movie full of beautiful monsters, and on that level is is an amazing film in the genre.

The human characters, however, leave much to be desired. Generally, a good rule for human characters in Kaiju movies is to avoid being obtrusive. There are a handful of characters in this movie who are just flat-out grating none more so than Vera Farmiga’s character. I love me some Vera Farmiga, she was great in Bates Motel and The Conjuring movies but here they have her playing a character who decides she wants to use a kaiju-signaling device to awaken all of the sleeping Titans to “cleanse the Earth” or some nonsense and there is just an air of dumbness around this whole subplot that bogs the movie down. What’s worse, she’s not even fully committed to the plan and struggles with it throughout the movie. 

Kyle Chandler (who previously appeared in Peter Jackson’s King Kong) plays her ex-husband and seems like he also doesn’t seem to be fully in the movie. His character is reluctantly dragged into the events of the story and seems to be only grudgingly in the movie. Bradley Whitford plays a wise-cracking Monarch agent, whose schtick goes tiresome after a few scenes. The great Ken Wanatabe returns from Godzilla seemingly to provide Japanese street cred and to occasionally say “Go-jira.”

THE MONSTERS

Okay, we’ve established that the human characters are pretty terrible and annoying in this movie, however, the monsters are exquisite. Godzilla is fairly unchanged for better or worse from his eponymous movie, although we do learn a bit more about him here such as the fact that he’s his own fricking Batcave in the ruins of an underwater Atlantean city. This movie also establishes that his species has been around since the dawn of history or before and are intertwined with ancient humanity. We do also see the Monsterverse version of Burning Godzilla, the meltdown version of the monster before his death in Godzilla vs. Destoroyah although here it is a temporary state and they don't take the opportunity to kill him off or reboot his design.

The movie also introduces us to the Monsterverse version of Mothra, here reimagined as essentially every insect with traits of butterflies, wasps, and mantises. Although she looks good I do think she’s a little over-designed to make her look deadly. Part of the appeal of Motha was that she is deadly while also looking cute and harmless.  She’s always been able to hold her own despite looking like a plush butterfly. 

Rodan also makes his American movie debut, here climbing out of a Mexican volcano, ironic since the original Rodan met his demise in volcano. This version of the character is a nice update of the original design, with perhaps some more gnarly avian features. He also seems to be perpetually burning, giving cool “firebird” vibes. True to form, he is incredibly destructive, leaving hurricane winds in his wake which literally pull people and cars into the sky.

The real star of this movie, however, is King Ghidorah who I will just go on record as saying has never looked better than he does in this movie. This is a beautiful character design and execution. This version of the character is notable for having larger-than-normal wings which give him a majestic appearance and very long, serpentine necks. He is recognizably Ghidorah but instead of the very awkward and vertical orientation the character had in is suitmation days, this version is more animalistic and crawls on its wings like a pterodactyl, long necks undulating before it. I also love the interactions of the heads, with the central one being the most dominant and the right head being a little derpy, the source of the famous meme template.

This is the first time the character has appeared in a big-budget Hollywood movie and it is quite a big deal. This character is one of the most frequently appearing kaiju in the long-running Godzilla series, having made his first appearance in 1965’s Ghidorah, the Three-Headed Monster. He has the distinction of being the titular monster in not one but two Godzilla movies (Invasion of the Astro-Monster is the other), although Ghidorah has never had a solo movie like Mothra, Rodan, and Varan. That said, the golden space dragon was all over the Showa movies and is essentially Godzilla’s arch nemesis. So his appearance in King of the Monsters is as big as the first movie appearance of the Joker in the 1989 Batman movie. So I am very happy the movie did him justice. 

MOST MEMORABLE MOMENT 

Ghidorah’s emergence from the Antarctic ice and we first see a weird collection of legs and tails and we don't really even know what we are looking at. Love that shot.

TRAILER

Patrick Garone

Monster Movie of the Week: Kong Skull Island (2017)

Directed by: Jordan Voght-Roberts

Genre: Kaiju/Jungle Adventure/War

THE MOVIE:

Gareth Edward's 2016 Godzilla movie launched a new shared universe, the Monsterverse which is still going strong with multiple movies, television shows, and ancillary media. The first follow-up to Godzilla is a prequel set in 1973 during the Vietnam War era and is a fun genre mash-up that mixes kaiju action, the King Kong mythos, and Vietnam war movie flavor. Thankfully, this movie wisely avoids retreading the classic story which was done so lovingly in Peter Jackson’s 2005 movie. 

Although this movie is in no way a remake of any past movies, there are some echoes of the classic Kong stories. Like the previous films, Skull Island features an expedition to the titular location, although here on an expedition for the Monarch organization introduced in Godzilla. As always, there is a blond woman, here played by Brie Larson who like her predecessors forms a (in this case, brief) connection to Kong. There is a dashing leading man, played by Tom Hiddleston, in full action hero mode. Sam Jackson plays a military commander who forms and instant grudge against Kong and is one of the few actors I can think of who can both believably stare down a 100 foot ape and shut down a self-righteous monologue with a well-placed “Bitch, please.” I do think this is one of Jackson’s most iconic and fun performances. Also, a fun game in this movie is counting the other MCU actors which includes some more obscure ones like John C. Reilly and Eugene Cordero.

Skull Island also does a lot to flesh out the world of the Monsterverse, centering on John Goodman’s character, Bill Randa, who is in some ways is fulfilling the Carl Denham role as the morally ambiguous figure who sets the whole voyage in motion here in service of Monarch. Randa is also a major character in Monarch: Legacy of Monsters, which features him in the decades prior to Skull Island and the early years of the organization. Kong: Skull Island also eases us into the concept of the Hollow Earth which is a major plot point in the subsequent movies. This theory is alluded to by Corey Hawkins character, who also appears decades later in 2019’s Godzilla: King of the Monsters.

This movie introduces audiences to a new, bigger Kong and sets the giant primate up to go on new adventures. The Monsterverse does a wonderful job with Kong over the course of the series making him a compelling character in his own right with a satisfying arc that finally frees him from his tragic story.

However, the greatest legacy of this movie is adding a much needed element of fun to the Monsterverse after the somewhat glum and serious Godzilla. Skull Island and the subsequent Kong/Godzilla team-up movies are really notable for their often unexpected and quirky tones, bold, inventive action and visuals and excellent characterization of Kong and some of the other creatures and that really starts with Jordan Voght-Roberts’ direction here and is built up in the subsequent movies. 

THE MONSTERS/EFFECTS:

This design is much more upright and less Gorilla-like than he was in Jackson’s version. Kong here is not at his full adult size yet but the movie clearly scales him up prepping for his planned fight against Godzilla, which doesn’t happen for another fifty years in the movie continuity. Certainly he is much bigger than he has been in American media. Remember, classic Kong is only about 25 feet tall and about twice the size of the largest apes to have lived. That is barely up to Godzilla's cankle and hardly makes for an interesting match up so to play in Godzilla's sandbox he's always had to be scaled up significantly (classic Toho Kong is a little bigger than he is depicted in this movie.)

Skull Island, as always, is full of creatures. While there is not the fully realized prehistoric ecosystem of the 2005 Peter Jackson movie, there are a handful of memorable creatures here including some Pterodactyls, a giant yak, an overgrown octopus (seemingly a Toho throwback), and a creepy giant stilt-legged bug, that is the source of a memorable horror scene. There are some other creatures native to Skull Island which we see later in the franchise in Monarch season 2.

Instead of the usual dinosaurs, this Kong's natural rivals are two-limbed reptilian creatures which Reilly's character self-consciously dubs, Skull Crawlers. One of Kong's main roles in the Skull Island eco-system is to control the population of these creatures. These monsters have a unique design with a weird two-legged walk. Their heads are covered with a bony exo-skull, hence their name. They have a maw filled with teeth and their prehensile tongues. The final boss is the giant Skull Devil which emerges from underground, possibly straight from Hollow Earth from where these creatures originate. Kong fights the Skull Devil at the end of the movie, here beginning his habit in the Monsterverse of wielding a variety of tools (boat propellers, Godzilla Spine Axes, Power Gloves, children) to defeat his enemies.

MOST MEMORABLE MOMENT: 

Our first encounter with Kong, as the helicopters descend on the island Apocalypse Now-style, complete with requisite Classic Rock soundtrack only to have one of them fall prey to a giant tree trunk thrown like a spear and we suddenly go from one genre movie into a completely different one.

SEQUELS:

Followed by Godzilla: King of the Monsters (2019), Godzilla vs. Kong (2021), Godzilla X Kong: The New Empire (2024) and Godzilla X Kong: Supernova (2027)

The Apple TV series Monarch Legacy of Monsters (2023-) goes into the backstory of Bill Randa and the origins of Monarch. An animated series Skull Island also is set fully on the titular island twenty years after the events Kong: Skull Island.

SEE ALSO

Primitive War (2025) One of the few movies that has the same genre profile as Kong: Skull Island this is another Vietnam era monster movie only in this case a squad of soldiers finds themselves in an inexplicably dinosaur-jungle. Filled with fantastic dinosaurs and over-the-top action and gore.

Patrick Garone

Mexico City: 20 Years After The Incident

Note: I was kindly granted access by the Mexican government to their capital on a journalistic visa for this article on the events that occurred here two decades ago. As I stand in the bustling Nuevo Zocalo surrounded by the rebuilt governmental buildings, the giant redesigned Mexican flag waving over me (the eagle now colored green) I can’t help feel that as an American, I am not quite trusted in this newly insular, more technologically-advanced country.

The Mexican flag, redesigned in 2017. 

 

​A generation of Mexicans have grown up under El Milagro Mexicano, what people in the country call “The Mexican Miracle,” which followed the day of terror and revelation which forever changed Mexico and the world. In the US we are more inclined to refer to it as The 2010 Mexico City UFO Incident but that hardly sums up what happened that day and its long-ranging consequences for the world.

What has been described as the "Aztec UFO."

As is well-documented, on the morning of September 18th, 2010, a massive UFO appeared over Mexico City, communicating messages in the indigenous Nahautl language. The Mexican government under the leadership of then-President Manuel Luis Carrasco-sent an envoy-his cabinet Minister Melquíades Guzmán-and a translator-Sandra Ramirez-to the ship, where they disappeared for several hours only for Guzmán to return, dead and mutilated. Ramirez was not seen again, except briefly at the ruins of Teotihuacán. 

Sandra Ramirez and Melquíades Guzmán, prior to boarding the UFO.

It was at the former archeological site and tourist attraction where she reunited with her younger brother, Eddie Ramirez before disappearing again. Her brief conversation with her brother is the source of what little insight that we have into the the ship’s occupants. Teotihuacán has been closed to the public since the day of the incident and shrouded in secrecy. My requests to visit the site were denied by the Mexican government. The site has an aura of mystery and is often referred to as the Mexican Area 51.

Eddie Ramirez and President Carrasco, shortly after the incident.

The aliens-if that’s what they were-then released a giant creature which proceeded to destroy a large swath of Mexico City, seemingly invincible to the many weapons the Mexican defense force threw at it. The creature, nicknamed after the Aztec death goddess Coatlicue, was only stopped when another monster rose up to defeat it. 

The Coatlicue creature, 2010.

This second creature-apparently connected to the mythic Quetzalcoatl itself-had seemingly rose from the ocean floor on its own accord, and is believed to be otherwise unrelated to the UFO. After a pitched battle, Quetzalcoatl defeated Coatlicue and several other creatures and then the ship itself before both the Feathered Serpent and the UFO disappeared never to be seen again.

The Quetzalcoatl creature, 2010.

The world was left with the knowledge that these things-monsters, gods, UFOs-all definitively exist and the impact on the human psyche cannot be overestimated. The incidents have inspired various cults and religions both within Mexico and outside it. 

A young Mexican girl worshipping at an offering table dedicated to Quetzalcoatl.

Some of these are centered around the figure of Quetzalcoatl himself, already a Christ-like figure in Mexican mythology. Other belief systems inspired by these incidents are of a kind we have seen before-UFO cults-born out of the existential shock and despair that accompanied the day's revelations. These have particularly taken root in the United States.

A UFO cult in the southwestern United States.

Despite prayers to the contrary Quetzalcoatl has not returned since that fateful day in 2010. However, there have been sightings in the last few years of...something in the Pacific Ocean off the coasts of Central and South America. The Peruvians have nicknamed it "Mama Cocha" after the Incan ocean goddess. If the reports are to be believed (and they may not be) the cryptid is roughly the size of the Feathered Serpent. If it exists at all, the creature seems to be content to avoid human beings for the moment. Indeed, South America and Perú in particular has become something a hotbed for these sightings, with another potential animal frequently sighted in Lake Titicaca.

Unknown creature sighting off the coast of Perú, 2026.

In the wake of the 2010 incident, Mexico was left to rebuild its capital but not without some very valuable resources falling into its possession. Not only had the mysterious invaders left behind a great deal of their technology in the form of wreckage from Coatlicue’s massive deployment pod but allegedly also one of the “teleportation rings” and weapons used by the invaders to travel to and from their ship as well as some hull wreckage blasted from the vessel during Quetzalcoatl’s attack. Perhaps more importantly were the extensive biological remains of Coatlicue and the creatures that she bore during the incident.

Coatlicue creature remains, 2010.

What should also not be discounted is the importance of the millions of Mexican nationals that returned to the country from the United States in the weeks after the attack. This influx of workers not only provided a boon during the reconstruction of the city but also proved to be crippling to the country’s northern neighbor, and later geopolitical rival. The US had initially gone as far as offering incentives to bring some of those workers back, ironic considering the years of threats and harassment to the Mexican migrant population that had lived within its borders for decades.

Part of the "caravan" of Mexican nationals that returned to Mexico after the attacks.

In the ensuing years, Mexico pulled all of those resources into good use, reverse-engineering much of the alien technology, turning Mexico-under Carasco’s savvy leadership-into a hub of advanced industry and biotech. 

President Carrasco, immediately after the attacks.

A short list of Mexican advancements during this time: hypersonic mag-lev trains, teleportation technology, cures for numerous diseases (including most cancers), a kind of force field technology, futuristic alloys and materials, and some kind of mysterious clean power source. Parts of Mexico City are barely recognizable at this point with gleaming neon skyscrapers looking more like a futuristic anime megalopolis than Mexico’s ancient capital.

Needless to say, all of this technology has been proprietary and Mexico has declined to share it with the rest of the world. Indeed, the last twenty years has seen a remarkable turnaround in the country, long seen as a backward third-world nation, now a technocratic world leader.

The transition has been more difficult for those of us in the US, a country that has never quite recovered from the economic loss of workers nor the psychological toll of its southern neighbor clearly surpassing its fortunes. Indeed, it has become common for American citizens to attempt to circumvent the miles long, technologically-advanced invisible wall that Mexico has constructed on its northern border, creating a tragic humanitarian situation at the frontier. Under a 2027 program, Americans of Mexican descent who can document their Mexican ancestry can now apply for Mexican citizenship and emigrate to their ancestral home and many are choosing to seek opportunity in the United States of Mexico.

During my recent trip to the country, I was allowed to sit down and interview now-United Nations Secretary-General Manuel Carrasco to discuss the anniversary of the attacks and its legacy for Mexico and the world.

Carrasco, 2027 at the United Nations.

MY INTERVIEW WITH SECRETARY GENERAL CARRASCO (EDITED FOR LENGTH AND CLARITY)

PG: Let's start with the aliens. All these years later we know precious little about them.

CARRASCO: We know almost nothing about the occupants of the ship. What little we do know was lost with Sandra Ramirez, who herself had only spent a few hours with them. There are things about that day that I fear we will never know.

PG: But they are human beings? Testimonials suggest bodies were recovered at Teotihuacán...

CARRASCO: No comment.

PG: It seems like much of what we know hinges on the account of Eddie Ramirez yet he is famously reclusive and has given no substantial interviews to the press.

CARRASCO: Eddie Ramirez lost his sister that day. He’s made his statements over the years. I think the has earned a little privacy. As has his brother.

PG: And what of Mexico’s territorial aspirations? Is it true that you have designs on the Southwestern United States?

CARRASCO: (Chuckling) While I can’t speak for president Zacatalco, I can’t see us making a land grab like that. This is the twenty-first century, not the nineteenth…

PG: Given your new role, has there been any consideration to sharing technology with the rest of the world? Mexico has been reluctant to do this…

CARRASCO: I’m happy to announce that Mexico will begin sharing certain technologies with some of our developing neighbors within the hemisphere in a very limited, very controlled basis. And with the US we have negotiated making some medical treatments available for free to US citizens in international waters, not on Mexican or US soil.

PG: And that’s it?

CARRASCO: That’s it. We are the custodians of great power and knowledge that came out of those events, two decades ago. We have a responsibility to ensure they are used responsibly and do not fall into the wrong hands and the more we share the greater the risk of that happening.

PG: Speaking of the technology, what response do you have to reports that agents from the US or US-based companies have acquired bio-samples from the Coatlicue creature?

CARRASCO: I would say that this would be a dangerous and foolish thing to do. Look, there have been numerous wonderful things have come from our work with them, including revolutionary cancer treatments. But an army of monsters could just as easily be developed by bad actors and used to terrorize the world. To date, Mexico is the only country to face a giant monster attack. I pray that this remains so. Because of this fact, Mexico has a special responsibility to safeguard this technology.

PG: Okay, regarding the Occupants, as you call them, there is a rumor that is gaining traction online that the ship was not alien at all but a ship that travelled back from the future-a future that Mexico is actively creating.

CARRASCO: Well, that’s an intriguing idea but and I suppose it’s as possible as all the other theories. Although, I would imagine there are better ways to leave us this technology than destroying the Centro and killing thousands of our citizens.

PG: And what about Quetzalcoatl and the reports he has been seen in the Pacific?

CARRASCO: I don't think there is any quality information to indicate this. But many in my country see the return of Quetzalcoatl to be a wondrous thing.

PG: Last question: Is Mexico ready for another giant monster attack?”

CARRASCO: Mexico is more ready than it ever has been before.

 

Patrick Garone

The Book of Boba Fett

In 2021, after two well-regarded seasons of The Mandalorian, Disney Plus Star Wars television seemingly could do no wrong. Two slam dunks were apparently on the way with an Obi-Wan Kenobi show and a series based on popular side character Boba Fett, who had been featured in an awesome season two The Mandalorian episode. However, by the time The Book of Boba Fett finally arrived, Star Wars fans had reverted back to their natural feral state and had Big Problems with the show. This second Star Wars  television series marked the start of yet another cycle of fan hand-wringing and discontent.

Admittedly, some of this had to do with genuine issues with the project. First, making a show about Boba Fett was a risky proposition to begin with. Arguably the original Glup Shitto, the character has always been a cipher onto which fans had projected their own desires, stories, and expectations. While his brief time in Attack of the Clones and The Clone Wars did a little to define him, his actual adult characterization was still largely unknown, other than that he wore cool armor and was intimidating. 

While his featured episode on The Mandalorian gave fans a lot of what they wanted (namely action), to base a whole show around him meant you had to make choices about who he is and what he wants as a character, which was always going to disappoint people who had their own idea of who the character was.  For me, having the show be about Boba Fett’s rise to becoming the crime lord of Tatooine was not the most interesting possible option. With that decision, you lose one of the few definitive things that we knew about him, that he was a world-hopping bounty hunter who spent his time on Slave 1 tracking valuable bounties. This decision was akin to the one that finally gave us a post-ROTJ Luke Skywalker who was an embittered old hermit, certainly a credible choice but not one that most people wanted to see after all these years. Equally with Boba Fett we are getting a valid characterization but one that is missing some of the things we would have expected from a show centered around the character.

While the series honors George Lucas' casting of Temuera Morrison who had played his dad/clone donor Jango Fett, I wonder if the show might have been better off recasting another Kiwi actor for the role as Morrison is at least ten years too old to be playing this character. Morrison spends the bulk of the series unhelmeted (occasionally barely-clothed) and with his distractingly white teeth and extreme facial expressions he is less intimidating than he was when he played Jango, twenty years earlier. 

Not unlike The Acolyte, the story told in The Book of Boba Fett is presented in a way that features heavy use of flashbacks instead of presenting the narrative in a more straightforward, chronological manner. Essentially we are jumping between a "past" time period and the "present." The past period spans from months after Return of the Jedi to the events of seasons one and two of The Mandalorian. The present period takes place months after the second season of The Mandalorian. There are some fan edits of the show that recut it into one or more movies, and these are actually pretty good and I would say an improvement to the way the series is presented on Disney Plus. I will say though, on this recent rewatch I enjoyed the original cut much more than I remembered.

Another issue that fans had with the show is that there is essentially a whole episode and a half of The Mandalorian right in the middle of it. This doesn’t really bother me, since, first, it’s a great and significant episode and, second, they could change the title of this show and Din Djarin’s show The Mandalorians and I would be fine since there is seemingly an open question as to who "the" Mandalorian is. I mean, Din and Grogu are getting their own movie. They're okay. Also, at this point it had been a year since the season two finale and I certainly did not want to leave these characters in limbo for another year or more.

In fact I would love to see a The Mandalorians re-edit that actually recuts and reshuffles the episodes of The Book of Boba Fett with episodes of The Mandalorian as a cohesive whole. Unfortunately, the flashback element prevents you from just watching them in chronological order so some creative editing would be involved.

I’ll take it chronologically here as the story starts with Boba escaping the Sarlaac pit, a moment that has loomed large in the consciousness of fans since Jedi. We see him in the juicy maw of the beast as he makes his way to a fallen Stormtrooper for oxygen and then blasts his way to safety, finally passing out in the desert. He is first found by Jawas who scavenge his armor (later selling it to Cobb Vanth, who ultimately gives it to Din Djarin in Season 2 of The Mandalorian). Boba is next captured by Tusken Raiders and his time with the Sandpeople is a major subplot in the show.

Boba's 1984 Marvel Comics escape from the Sarlaac.

To the extent that Star Wars is a Western (particularly the Tatooine sequences) the Sandpeople have always been analogues for Native Americans. In Lucas’ movies they were always depicted as a sinister Other lurking in the desert wastes of Tatooine. As progressive as George Lucas is in his politics, his cinematic sensibilities are often seemingly rooted the retrograde media he consumed in his youth, and the Sandpeople very much fulfill the role of the malevolent Indians in movies like The Searchers. Indeed, they are literally defined by their tendency to raid the human settlements on Tatooine. Their kidnapping of Shmi Skywalker prior to the events of Attack of the Clones and Anakin’s subsequent slaughter of their tribe is a major turning point in the history of the Star Wars galaxy. No wonder their masks bear a passing resemblance to that of Vader. The two are clearly Star Wars' design language, if only because they were created by Ralph McQuarrie at the same time, but the saga has always been good about making these kinds of subtle visual connections. 

McQuarrie Sandpeople concept art which inspired a scene from TBOBF

Of course, according to Lucas’ own lore, the Sandpeople and Jawas are the original inhabitants of the planet and everyone else are off-world colonizers who had abandoned early attempts to mine the planet. Given that that star/producer of the show Temeura Morrison is a Māori from New Zealand and the showrunner Robert Rodriguez is Mexican-American it’s no surprise that The Book of Boba Fett gives us a more nuanced and sympathetic view of the indigenous people of Tatooine, a process that began in The Mandalorian. 

Boba’s time with the Sandpeople changes and redeems him although, again, we are redeeming a character that we hardly knew to begin with so it’s not as effective as it might have been. When his tribe is slaughtered by a swoop gang aligned with the Pyke Crime Syndicate Boba seems to make up his mind to reclaim his ship from Jabba’s palace and clean up Tatooine as the new Daimyo, although not before dealing some revenge to the swoop gang and-in a sequence that makes my inner child squeal-the Sarlaac pit.

Much of the current-day plot of The Book of Boba Fett has to do with Boba and Fennic navigating the landscape of crime families centered around Mos Espa (featured in The Phantom Menace and not to be confused with the more famous Mos Eisley). His attempts to consolidate power puts him in conflict also puts him into conflict with the Ithorian mayor, represented by his Twi-Lek Majordomo (played by yet another Chicago 1990's improv figure, Dave Pasquesi here joining his Strangers with Candy costar Amy Sederis returning from The Mandalorian) and  a pair of twin Hutts who bestow a rancor on Boba before retreating from the planet. These Hutts by the way are set to return in The Mandalorian and Grogu. 

The main antagonists of the show are the Pykes who employ the bounty hunter, Cad Bane, a popular character from the animated side of Star Wars and in possession of Star Wars most on-the-nose name (sorry Elan Sleazebaggano). Bane makes his live-action debut here. 

Cad Bane is a Duros bounty hunter (think the pair of bulbous-headed, blue-skinned, red-eyed creatures from the Cantina) who goes full-tilt on the Spaghetti-Western element of Star Wars, largely based on Lee Van Cleef's character in The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly. In his animated appearances he has proven himself to be extremely tough and ruthless, going toe-to-toe with characters like Obi-Wan Kenobi. Over the years, he has gotten far more character development than Boba Fett ever did, and if this show was The Book of Cad Bane the chosen story might have actually worked better. While characters making the transition from animation to live-action have a mixed record in Star Wars (we'll be talking about Obi-Wan Kenobi next), Cad Bane looks and sounds fantastic. He's actually a terrifying villain and one of my complaints with TBOBF is that he is not in the show more, he works really well.

Fett also picks up some allies on Tatooine, most controversially, the Mods, a group of Tatooine youths who are augmented with droid parts and drive around in brightly-colored repulsor scooters. My problem with them is not that they are not "Star Wars" as some fans complained but they don't seem to match Tatooine very well. I can totally see this particular group driving around Coruscant but they seem out of place in the dusty streets of Mos Espa with its grungy aesthetic. Another ally Boba picks up during the course of the show is Krrsantan, a black-furred Wookie bounty hunter that has his origins in the Disney/Marvel Star Wars comics. Krrsantan is awesome and I hope we see more of him in live-action. 

As stated above, we catch up with Din Djarin for a solid episode. At this point he has been on his own for several months without Grogu and still in search of his Mandalorian covert. As his ship was destroyed in season two he is also getting around on public transportation. He is also inexpertly attempting to wield the Darksaber he acquired by defeating Giddeon and is injuring himself with it. Bro is not in a good place.

Somehow, the Mandalorian returned.

When he tracks down the Armorer on a distant ring world, he confesses to having removed his helmet and is excommunicated from his community unless he can "bathe in the living waters of Mandalore." As a viewer, I am losing patience somewhat with the incredibly impractical and seemingly whimsical rules of this cult. We need to capture Din and deprogram him.

Mando makes his way to Tatooine to buy a new Razorcrest from Pelli Moto (yes, his intention was always to get another one) only to find that she has pulled a bait-and-switch and is instead attempting to sell him a souped-up N-1 starfighter (as piloted by Anakin in The Phantom Menace.) One of the things I love about this Mandoverse is how inclusive it is of all eras of Star Wars and I was so happy to see the return of this iconic design from the Prequels. Also, the idea of Mando and Pelli essentially rebuilding this hotrod in her garage feels very George Lucas. While on Tatooine Din is recruited by Fennic Shand to work for Boba Fett but first he makes a trip to see Grogu.

Grogu has become Luke's first student at his under-construction Jedi academy on Ossus (we later see this location destroyed in flashback in The Force Awakens). First, the de-aging or whatever voodoo is being done to create Luke Skywalker here is actually very good and Luke does a lot more here than in his single mostly stationary speaking scene in season two of The Mandalorian. Characterwise, they seem to be doubling down on Luke being a little unlikable and Jedi orthodox, which I think works well with his eventual arc.

Din arrives and is met by none other than Ahsoka Tano, who intercepts him and explains that his visit might not be the best thing for Grogu, who is still very attached to the Mandalorian. Din gives her a gift for Grogu, some Beskar chainmail that he had made for him. I'm honestly a little puzzled by Ahsoka "I'm no Jedi" Tano here who should know better than to be playing along with this high-handed Jedi bullshit. Also, frustratingly we never got to see the very important scene where Luke and Ahsoka met for the first time. She's just hanging out at the Temple site.

After Mando leaves, Luke sits down with Grogu and essentially gives him an ultimatum, you can have the chainmail and go back with Din or you can have Yoda's old lightsaber if you stay and train. But you cannot have both. The dickishness is strong with this one. Apparently Grogu chooses the chainmail and Luke essentially puts him in a cab and sends him to Tatooine. Like, how salty was Luke Skywalker about this decision?

Meanwhile on The Book of Boba Fett, Boba and his allies are making a last stand against the Pykes, Cad Bane and a couple of giant battle droids. Grogu arrives in the middle of this and reunites with Din, in a battle that now also involves Boba riding his Rancor and defeating the Pykes and (apparently) killing Cad Bane.

We end up with Boba now firmly in control of Tatooine...and we have not seen him since despite Temuera Morrison regularly letting it be known he would like to come back. It is rumored however that the Mandoverse will conclude with a movie or series of movies tying together elements from the New Republic-era shows: The Mandalorian, The Book of Boba Fett, Ahsoka, and Skeleton Crew.

Patrick Garone